Today our great friend Nelly Tsoy left for her home country of Tajikistan. She has been a strength to our family and a comfort to our hearts. Nelly, what will we do without you? We love you very much.



Judy and I are hoping to get to Central Asia in a couple years to visit some of our friends who live there. We'll see.



I have a new friend, T., who was drunk and had a car accident. The other driver was killed. Now he's recovering and waiting to see what happens next. This situation has opened his eyes to his need to become a real Christian. It's an open window for the Love of God to get through...



T. and I have had some good conversations over the last week. One thing we talked about was how the second verse of Amazing Grace says, "'Twas Grace that taught my heart to fear, and grace my fears relieved..."



It's like, for many Christian people nowadays, Grace has no meaning because there's no FEAR... It's like, they never got terrified of the implications of a life without Jesus, under the wrath of God, headed for judgment and eternal condemnation...



Before I heard the message and believed, I was a very angry guy. I was a Straight-Edge Skinhead wannabe in New York, during the time that Strait-Edge was new... But at the core of my philosophy was the knowledge that I was deeply selfish and evil... That there was no hope for me to ever be clean or pure or righteous, because my inner being was so stained and smeared with selfish desires...

I understood that life was futile. I knew that I was guilty. I tried not to consider myself responsible for the weight of wrongdoing and evil speech that was gathering on my head, but I knew that I was a servant of darkness.



I started to get fascinated with death and the occult. I despaired of ever having a family, or even a normal relationship with another person. I hated my parents and those who were weaker than me. I resented authority with deep, simmering passion.



But I broke.



And I saw. And my heart feared. Because Grace taught me that i can hope for rescue. And I heard the message about Born Again life, and having the Counselor live inside me. And I cried out to have it. I cried out to Jesus.



And he laid it on me.



Now it's like 15 years later and I'm amazed by grace every day, whether my heart tells me I did a good job, or a bad one. I'm a slave to Jesus, and here I stay.



I feel sorry for people who go to church and all the rigamarole without the true meaning of Grace at work in their hearts. There are many.



In Matthew 7, there are some shocking words from Jesus:

"Not all people who sound religious are really godly. They may refer to me as 'Lord,' but they still won't enter the Kingdom of Heaven. The decisive issue is whether they obey my Father in Heaven. On judgment day many will tell me, 'Lord, Lord, we prophesied in your name and cast out demons in your name and performed many miracles in your name.' But I will reply, 'I never knew you. Go away, the things you did were unauthorised."



I hope you walk in Grace today, my friends. Real grace, with teeth and claws, that cuts, and heals, your heart.



Lew