If you know me, you've seen me in a conflict. I get pretty jazzed. I dig it. Conflict is where we grow, where we lay down our life for others in small ways, and where we receive sight where we were blind...
But so many of us are "taken to a bad place" by even the smallest hint of conflict! Fear, pain, shame, past abuses, pockets of disbelief in Gods love... it all gets stirred up by our conflicts in daily life.
But dont shout. Dont lash out. Get quiet and get interested in what is happening under the surface. Spend time praying about (and for) people who drive you crazy. Look for the sweet spot where you lay down your own preferences to serve, bearing with the weakness and need of others... always forgiving any missing the mark in others.
Dont abuse. Listen. Ask questions to learn about the other's perspective. Get into their shoes. See through their eyes. Maybe they're crazy. Maybe they're hurting. Maybe you are. But you'll both be healed and strengthened when you come together over a conflict.
So fight fair. Share hearts. Take time. Come back and try again and again. Dont be afraid to disagree over a long period of time. No one needs to change their mind RiGHT NOW.
Be aware that your intention in conflict is often to get the other to affirm you. Get your affirmation from God, and your conflicts will be turned productive...
Some thoughts from my mobile as i considered ephesians "...speak the truth in love..." and "be angry and do not sin..."
im looking back at all this stuff and its so good, your such an awesome dude and im so happy to have you as a brother in the Lord,
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