nobody should miss seth's movie...
Saturday, May 31, 2008
Thursday, May 29, 2008
...about that paul w. thing
the thing is, there's all this stuff in the Bible that Jesus says that totally ruins american-style christianity.
just ruins it.
ruins it.
so, when we live in a country, among a church that is so largely and deeply false... how do we live out our MEMBERSHIP with the church in our land?
Look at how nehemiah prayed,
and daniel...
just ruins it.
ruins it.
so, when we live in a country, among a church that is so largely and deeply false... how do we live out our MEMBERSHIP with the church in our land?
Look at how nehemiah prayed,
and daniel...
checking ourselves...
there's this idea that i find operative in a lot of my conversation with church folks: the idea that self-doubt is BAD.
but there's a capacity to which it is necessary and good.
2 Cor.13:5
Jeremiah 17:5-14
In Philippians, we are given the "fear" line, too.
...and in Matt. 10
thoughts?
but there's a capacity to which it is necessary and good.
2 Cor.13:5
Jeremiah 17:5-14
In Philippians, we are given the "fear" line, too.
...and in Matt. 10
thoughts?
Saturday, May 24, 2008
Many Jesuses vs. One Jesus
compare this with the crossroads video i posted last week.
wanna put these two dudes in a room together? i do.
(this part in parentheses is added later. i really regret writing that little line there, some time later. it seems like i'm pitting 2 christians against each other. that is wrong. i DO want to be in a room with them, and all of you, as well, though. There are 2 different messages at work in the body, right now, in the church, that is. there's the jesus whom the Scriptures DON'T describe, and the one they DO. Better stated there are actually many many jesuses that the Scriptures aren't describing, but only one that they DO. all of us supposedly Christian folks are supposed to be Testing it all out (1John4) and getting it straight, ourselves, together. My intention is to stimulate your MINDS to consider these things. I am glad that people at xroads are doing good. good is good and help helps. I'm sure that the temple in the days of Jesus was a center for alms and benevolence for the poor. that was good, but JESUS was the POINT! When he came, he testified that it was all about HIM! And they drove him out. Now, we have tons of multi-million dollar churches that preach nothing that will scatter their following. I've seen them turn down the truth about hell again and again. And Peter, in acts 2, called men to be saved. Paul talked Wrath of God all over the place, and in Matt 23, Jesus' words about Hell are fearsome! What the heck? We need to awaken and pour ourselves a cup of the Scriptures that tell us about Jesus! I'm serious! This is important enough for exclamation points.)
Friday, May 23, 2008
Paul Washer did good.
compare this with the crossroads video i posted last week.
wanna put these two dudes in a room together? i do.
bill williams III
i actually have the pleasure and the privilege of being served coffee and good conversation by a gentleman named "Bill Williams III". He is one of the few people in the world whose name is William Williams. and he's the third installment, generationally speaking. So, good on ya' Bill. and if you read this blog and comment, I'll buy YOU a coffee.
as for me, i'm going skating for a minute, before i pick up the nin-yos from school.
Beard Check...
someone told me that i haven't posted any progress on the beard in the last year or so. turns out that's true, so here's a bone for all of you who wonder about just how long that thing's getting.
I was especialy motivated to update it because yesterday I started putting multiple rubber bands at the bottom of it... I like the extra support.
The beard is now long enough for me to place one fist under my chin, one fist under that, holding the beard, and still have more than an inch of beard sticking out from the bottom fist...
So that's how the beard's going.
My thanks ascend to God, who has granted me a generous, kind-hearted, loving, patient wife. She really really loves me. This is proof...
And to make it official...
Monday, May 19, 2008
a cold may night
I'm sitting here and it's 1129 pm and the rain's just coming down. Seth and Marcelo are the two newest recipients of the latest sickness: a cough of some sort with a snotty nose and whatnot... I just gave seth some medicine around 10...
anyway, this May has turned out cold. and i love that. but it's been cold, of all things. I remember last year as a very very hot year. I skated all the time and it was really really hot! really hot!
my bluejeans were dripping into my shoes! not really.
so far, it's cold and wet in cincinnati. good stuff. This morning was in the like 40s and the day got up into the 70's and then the temps dropped and the rain fell. rain bothers me because you can't skate, but today that's ok because i'm so far behind on study and writing and emails and skatepark hookups... so i did my work and now i'm off to bed...
just posted on the ongoing jeremiah study. get in there and comment around, back to the beginning... work your way through. all the posts get to me by email. automatically.
anyway, this May has turned out cold. and i love that. but it's been cold, of all things. I remember last year as a very very hot year. I skated all the time and it was really really hot! really hot!
my bluejeans were dripping into my shoes! not really.
so far, it's cold and wet in cincinnati. good stuff. This morning was in the like 40s and the day got up into the 70's and then the temps dropped and the rain fell. rain bothers me because you can't skate, but today that's ok because i'm so far behind on study and writing and emails and skatepark hookups... so i did my work and now i'm off to bed...
just posted on the ongoing jeremiah study. get in there and comment around, back to the beginning... work your way through. all the posts get to me by email. automatically.
comments: Wide Open
Sorry, all. didn't realize my comments weren't enabled for non-googlers. So now you don't have to have a google acct. to comment.
Sunday
church was intense on sunday.
we looked at how much of the bible talks about false teachers.
how many of the NT books...
how much of the prophets (jeremiah 23)
and how appropriate it is for us to discuss the reality that there are many false doctrines out there to "tame" the Jesus whom Scripture describes into something they can use to build movement and preserve attendance and giving.
Tonight, I was asked what I do "during a day". I told the dude (you are a very cool dude, btw) that today i dug footers for a deck, but on a normal day I am the pastor of a "Jesus People Church" (which is how I say that).
He looked intrigued. I don't know what he was thinking, exactly, but this tends to be one of those "moments of truth", so I laid it out:
We are a bunch of folks who've gotten tangled up in the Jesus that the Bible describes, who tends to be a whole lot more incredible and untame than the "Jesus that american churches dictate"... or something like that.
I don't know, but lights seemed to go on.
The definitely did for me, because upon returning home I realized, "That was the gospel". The good news.
The good news for today is that the Jesus whom the Scriptures describe is the way out Way Out. He is the best! He is Wonderful! Counselor! Everlasting Father! Prince of Peace... of His Kingdom there's no end... and we're actually waiting for Him to return... Life begins to feel like the snowdays we used to have in NY, where I was all dressed up and ready for (hell on earth) school and the radio said I could stay home. I had TIME. And freedom.
And with the Jesus that the Bible describes, you can get with him and STOP. You can turn from your ways and turn to HIM right Here and Now! No need for a uniform. No need for a pedigree! Anyone who wants OUT can have it. Just turn to Jesus and follow, leaving the old life behind...
That isn't confusing when you're in the market for salvation. In the market for comfy cozy, selfish religion? you don't know what to do with the Bible Jesus. Shopping for a self-realization? forget it, Dude'll never make sense to ya! He's answering your questions with questions...
but when you're on your face, gripping the edge of his robe, about to get killed with rocks for being an adulterous idiot--the Bible Jesus is the dude. He's not all, "it's okay, we all struggle..." He's like, MERCY: "...neither do i condemn you." and TRUTH: "Go and sin no more." Forgiveness and Holiness...
that's the Jesus!
There are just too many jesuses around! Don't settle for just any jesus, please (many will. they'll read this and go on ahead and pick a jesus--or create a new one--that suits their shopper-holics)...but please, don't settle for just any jesus. Pick out the One in Scripture... Join with others who have searched Him out.
Accept no substitutes! even if that means you have to have coffee in a living room over scripture, rather than enjoy vid-screens and pop-presentations.
Try not to die with regrets.
we looked at how much of the bible talks about false teachers.
how many of the NT books...
how much of the prophets (jeremiah 23)
and how appropriate it is for us to discuss the reality that there are many false doctrines out there to "tame" the Jesus whom Scripture describes into something they can use to build movement and preserve attendance and giving.
Tonight, I was asked what I do "during a day". I told the dude (you are a very cool dude, btw) that today i dug footers for a deck, but on a normal day I am the pastor of a "Jesus People Church" (which is how I say that).
He looked intrigued. I don't know what he was thinking, exactly, but this tends to be one of those "moments of truth", so I laid it out:
We are a bunch of folks who've gotten tangled up in the Jesus that the Bible describes, who tends to be a whole lot more incredible and untame than the "Jesus that american churches dictate"... or something like that.
I don't know, but lights seemed to go on.
The definitely did for me, because upon returning home I realized, "That was the gospel". The good news.
The good news for today is that the Jesus whom the Scriptures describe is the way out Way Out. He is the best! He is Wonderful! Counselor! Everlasting Father! Prince of Peace... of His Kingdom there's no end... and we're actually waiting for Him to return... Life begins to feel like the snowdays we used to have in NY, where I was all dressed up and ready for (hell on earth) school and the radio said I could stay home. I had TIME. And freedom.
And with the Jesus that the Bible describes, you can get with him and STOP. You can turn from your ways and turn to HIM right Here and Now! No need for a uniform. No need for a pedigree! Anyone who wants OUT can have it. Just turn to Jesus and follow, leaving the old life behind...
That isn't confusing when you're in the market for salvation. In the market for comfy cozy, selfish religion? you don't know what to do with the Bible Jesus. Shopping for a self-realization? forget it, Dude'll never make sense to ya! He's answering your questions with questions...
but when you're on your face, gripping the edge of his robe, about to get killed with rocks for being an adulterous idiot--the Bible Jesus is the dude. He's not all, "it's okay, we all struggle..." He's like, MERCY: "...neither do i condemn you." and TRUTH: "Go and sin no more." Forgiveness and Holiness...
that's the Jesus!
There are just too many jesuses around! Don't settle for just any jesus, please (many will. they'll read this and go on ahead and pick a jesus--or create a new one--that suits their shopper-holics)...but please, don't settle for just any jesus. Pick out the One in Scripture... Join with others who have searched Him out.
Accept no substitutes! even if that means you have to have coffee in a living room over scripture, rather than enjoy vid-screens and pop-presentations.
Try not to die with regrets.
Working with Gregory!
Well, I gotta say first, "Thanks Dad, for teaching me how to shovel." My dad is a master shoveler. He can shovel ALL DAY. He shovels for fun! And working on putting a skateboarding bowl, in concrete, in my backyard over the last couple of days has proven Dad's technique! I can shovel all day, too.
And today I employed the elder Ross's wisdom in the creation of footers for a deck in high-end Anderson Township with Brother Greg. Greg is a contractor and he eats deck construction for breakfast. He's a joy to work with: has the right tools, extra gloves, rented a machine for the heavy hole-work... a guy who gets things done right and done well. Hats off to greg, and the Jesus who built him.
So today I spent the time i usually spend on the freelance Jesus Pastor skater skatepark salesman... the school-day... on building with Greg, who is easy to work for.
thanks Boss.
And today I employed the elder Ross's wisdom in the creation of footers for a deck in high-end Anderson Township with Brother Greg. Greg is a contractor and he eats deck construction for breakfast. He's a joy to work with: has the right tools, extra gloves, rented a machine for the heavy hole-work... a guy who gets things done right and done well. Hats off to greg, and the Jesus who built him.
So today I spent the time i usually spend on the freelance Jesus Pastor skater skatepark salesman... the school-day... on building with Greg, who is easy to work for.
thanks Boss.
Saturday, May 17, 2008
Trying to Watch "Fruit of the Vine"
today sam and i were trying to watch this really really cool super 8 skate video documentary about the history and life of pool-skating. I gotta tell you i got a heart for pool skating. I skated a pool in NC last christmastime and it was kingly. cleaned it out myself and had 2 days of sessions in it. fell, hit my head, broke my glasses adn cut my own butterfly bandages out of waterproof athletic tape... fun. serious fun.
In that short bit of skating a real pool i realized that growing up in NY, there were no pools! everything we had around was above ground sheetmetal dealios... but there was Pulaski Pool in Poughkeepsie. I skated there one time but it was so HUGE to me, and there were like 4 feet of water/sludge in the deep end, and it was coooollllld. I just shot for walrides in the shallow. People were sick back there. Con Man doing huge ollie airs on the vert wall. that pool had like 7 feet of vert! Dudes were grinding on that...
Well, we were trying to watch it, and we just kinda said, "you wanna go dig one?" and we just turned it off and got up and dug for four hours and we got a shape and a bit of depth and a dream is born... We pretty much figure it could take as long as it needs to. Between all of us here who skate, we'll see it through. There's gonna be a sweet little ditch/bowl in my backyard...
Friday, May 16, 2008
being a radical
the other day my good friend whom i love dearly in Christ said i was a radical and he wasn't. He's a denominational minister who sees me like someone more "radical" than he is.
I responded, "What's not radical about someone who believes in the stuff of the Apostle's Creed?"
indeed, it must be said. I may have a beard and wear jeans and skate a lot. I may seem "radical". But if you are joined with Christ you are radical. Jesus is coming back! Jesus is coming soon! Jesus is King and Lord! Jesus is Judge of the living and the Dead! Jesus will reign!
These are BASICS to us! Root-level. That's what "radical" means. Like a Radish--just a root.
from root to fruit, we're just christians.
that is, unless you 've let someone cut in on you with gobbledygook that messes up the power of connection to the Crucified One. If you've lost the simplicity and purity of devotion to Jesus (2cor11:3), you need to repent and tear down your idols and sell all and follow Him.
even if it means loss of position and influence and all the "good" you could do, it is far better to serve Him in the clear, passionate preaching of the word, without compromise or fear whose toes you step on...
boy i love you... all of you readers. I hope in the depth of my heart that you continue to dive deep into the simple love that Jesus holds for you. That you become wise and sophisticated in applying the simple wisdom of that love to your daily steps in this world. that you not be blown about by the winds of men's trickery and false teaching, but that you grow into maturity in the real Jesus of Scripture--the one the Scriptures describe...
that you not just read about him, but that you would LIVE with him, NOW and forever... and me too.
I responded, "What's not radical about someone who believes in the stuff of the Apostle's Creed?"
indeed, it must be said. I may have a beard and wear jeans and skate a lot. I may seem "radical". But if you are joined with Christ you are radical. Jesus is coming back! Jesus is coming soon! Jesus is King and Lord! Jesus is Judge of the living and the Dead! Jesus will reign!
These are BASICS to us! Root-level. That's what "radical" means. Like a Radish--just a root.
from root to fruit, we're just christians.
that is, unless you 've let someone cut in on you with gobbledygook that messes up the power of connection to the Crucified One. If you've lost the simplicity and purity of devotion to Jesus (2cor11:3), you need to repent and tear down your idols and sell all and follow Him.
even if it means loss of position and influence and all the "good" you could do, it is far better to serve Him in the clear, passionate preaching of the word, without compromise or fear whose toes you step on...
boy i love you... all of you readers. I hope in the depth of my heart that you continue to dive deep into the simple love that Jesus holds for you. That you become wise and sophisticated in applying the simple wisdom of that love to your daily steps in this world. that you not be blown about by the winds of men's trickery and false teaching, but that you grow into maturity in the real Jesus of Scripture--the one the Scriptures describe...
that you not just read about him, but that you would LIVE with him, NOW and forever... and me too.
rain rain rain
i'm glad it's been rainy and kinda cold. i fell down, skating a small bowl in Middletown, OH, and really really hurt my palms. Happens a couple of times per year, that. very very painful. Sometimes for weeks and weeks, since i need my hands for falling all the time...
God has been kind to me to keep healing me and giving me the grace not to hit my head too often when my paws are tender...
So a few mornings in a row with temps in the 50's and rain do me well, lately. Maybe that's the 35 talkin' there.
But today, if i can find a dry spot, I'll skate for a while...
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
this is Zamar!!!!
sheena and chris's baby. he's so cute! and look at me. I'm magic with kids! Must be the beard!
how we got to Northside
I got up really really early today because i have a cough that only works sideways.
and i posted on www.lewminator.com about Dad Weiss' sickness and Mom Weiss' passing.
and i reflect again on the fact that we don't live here because of a specific calling to "urban ministry", or inner-city hoo-ha. We moved here because a dear friend, sister, mother...was dying and we needed a house with a ramp and enough room to do the stuff.
This funeral home was the open door, perhaps the "bait", to get us into this neighborhood. We looked at many homes, but this was the only one in over 2 years of searching that had the right combination.
-Handicap access
-first floor bathroom just off a bedroom
-proximity to hospitals
all that and we ended up CLOSER to the majority of our church people, with room to meet and practise hospitality. to be honest, city living is the life for me, so far. Being a longtime skateboarder, living on concrete suits me well, with a coffee shop and internet just down the road.
our neighbors! Oh the blessing of living among noisy, chaotic, needy, ignorant, foolish, godless, drug-addicted neighbors. (sorry for not mentioning the smart, motivated, artistic, intelligent, rich and poor, idealistic, debauched, drunken, amazing, depressing people, too) you can just step outside and relate to Jesus, who had compassion on the multitudes, even though he was exhausted, because they were like sheep without a shepherd.
(if you mind that last paragraph, i kind of do, too. I don't want anyone to not have their shepherd. if I had created the universe, we wouldn't need shepherding, but it wasn't me. it was God. Oh yeah, and if i created the universe you'd all be my slaves, too, so count your blessings.)
yes, over the years I hear a drum beating louder and louder, ominously threatening judgment on unfaithful religion in the land... lukewarm christianity and money-worship will fall.
...but here, i see the hand of Jesus reaching out in compassion and patience to the violent, lost sinners who don't know Him. ...here, loving your neighbor and turning the other cheek really show up in your behavior. every day is a day to love, in actual ways--you know, reality of action, NOW.
I can skate down the street and end up talking gospel with serious hardcore criminals, punkers, atheists, Mayan Calendar people... I mean it's astounding. This is even the "gay" neighborhood! Where better? (I don't believe in gay people)
And it is here in Northside...no, it is here in the pierced palm of Jesus' hand...that I have come to find my final denomination--i am one of the Jesus people. like when the pharisees adn sadduccees and the teachers of the law and the scribes were like, "These guys were with Jesus."
That's all I want to be. That is all we're supposed to be. The whole John the Baptist thing with the "I must decrease and he must increase" thing... the whole 2 corinthians 4-5 clay pots (grubbykupps) and "...put off this earthly tent..." thing...
So on my other blog I storied out on how our family got here...
and here I'm touching on how being here has been...growing us...
blessings. richest blessings on you, dear readers.
and i posted on www.lewminator.com about Dad Weiss' sickness and Mom Weiss' passing.
and i reflect again on the fact that we don't live here because of a specific calling to "urban ministry", or inner-city hoo-ha. We moved here because a dear friend, sister, mother...was dying and we needed a house with a ramp and enough room to do the stuff.
This funeral home was the open door, perhaps the "bait", to get us into this neighborhood. We looked at many homes, but this was the only one in over 2 years of searching that had the right combination.
-Handicap access
-first floor bathroom just off a bedroom
-proximity to hospitals
all that and we ended up CLOSER to the majority of our church people, with room to meet and practise hospitality. to be honest, city living is the life for me, so far. Being a longtime skateboarder, living on concrete suits me well, with a coffee shop and internet just down the road.
our neighbors! Oh the blessing of living among noisy, chaotic, needy, ignorant, foolish, godless, drug-addicted neighbors. (sorry for not mentioning the smart, motivated, artistic, intelligent, rich and poor, idealistic, debauched, drunken, amazing, depressing people, too) you can just step outside and relate to Jesus, who had compassion on the multitudes, even though he was exhausted, because they were like sheep without a shepherd.
(if you mind that last paragraph, i kind of do, too. I don't want anyone to not have their shepherd. if I had created the universe, we wouldn't need shepherding, but it wasn't me. it was God. Oh yeah, and if i created the universe you'd all be my slaves, too, so count your blessings.)
yes, over the years I hear a drum beating louder and louder, ominously threatening judgment on unfaithful religion in the land... lukewarm christianity and money-worship will fall.
...but here, i see the hand of Jesus reaching out in compassion and patience to the violent, lost sinners who don't know Him. ...here, loving your neighbor and turning the other cheek really show up in your behavior. every day is a day to love, in actual ways--you know, reality of action, NOW.
I can skate down the street and end up talking gospel with serious hardcore criminals, punkers, atheists, Mayan Calendar people... I mean it's astounding. This is even the "gay" neighborhood! Where better? (I don't believe in gay people)
And it is here in Northside...no, it is here in the pierced palm of Jesus' hand...that I have come to find my final denomination--i am one of the Jesus people. like when the pharisees adn sadduccees and the teachers of the law and the scribes were like, "These guys were with Jesus."
That's all I want to be. That is all we're supposed to be. The whole John the Baptist thing with the "I must decrease and he must increase" thing... the whole 2 corinthians 4-5 clay pots (grubbykupps) and "...put off this earthly tent..." thing...
So on my other blog I storied out on how our family got here...
and here I'm touching on how being here has been...growing us...
blessings. richest blessings on you, dear readers.
reminiscence on the past
it took over 70 years for my father in law to get sick. i mean life-changingly sick. sure, he'd had a stone here and a mini-stroke there (miraculously healed in car on way to hosp.). he broke his kneecap into 4 pieces one time. he had malaria as a youth, while he was in Indonesia in the Dutch army.
but around the summer of 2001--June--he got a staff infection in Mexico. THAT was sick. Weeks stretched into months and he was a goner. in a rare lucid moment he said he wanted to go. I told him we would take care of Mom and that everything was ok... it was like that, you know.
enter Johan, the eldest son. Comes into that hospital--i mean, Dad's dying here! Tubes, breathing machine. hadn't spoken for months. Missed--totally missed--September 11th. No kidney function. Dialysis... Doctors were going to cheese-knife his kidneys to see if anything was left! and in comes Johan, prays HARD, out loud, anoints with oil... and from that day Dad had an inexplicable turnaround...
i remain the dutiful son in law, who says, "it's okay. you go ahead and die." to his father in law. what a parable... in this one, i look real bad... (i'm way worse than that, so i don't mind playing that part.)
anyway, when dad got out of the hospital, he was broken. 86 pounds lighter, with this look of fear in his eyes, like a child, or a wild bird with a broken wing.
One fall would have killed him. no kidding. And the fear of going back to those tubes and machines and cold steel and cold hands and needles and all that was nipping at, no--it was like a horrible satan-dog from hell just snapping and baying at him like on "I Am Legend" in that one scene... you know?
That was in the early 2000's. Judy was pregnant with Seth. She traveled back and forth every week, sometimes twice a week--routinely twice a week--to Wilmore from here. I was at a UMC (methodist joint) getting my liver served up to me for making the wrong kind of disciples. Mom was... Mom.
Mom Weiss always cooked for us. Stuff from the Old Country, like potatoes with Kale mixed through, or soups with lots of sausage in them... She always pushed me to eat. Heck, in the first 3 months of marriage, I gained 20 pounds! That was mostly muscle, back then, because I was very very skinny when I married Judy, but Mom's cooking made me healthy. (i just ate taco bell before that--for like a year)
Mom Weiss always cleaned up after us. The whole family. She was so servant-minded. I think she knew her reward awaited her on the other side. She was often burdened, but served with grace. Always.
Mom embodied sainthood. And Mom loved Jesus. That's what she knew--Jesus. Her education in school ended around the sixth grade, but she loved Jesus and she knew the Word and she was wise. And she served...
And shortly after Dad's release she was diagnosed with terminal cancer, and 3 to six months to live (maybe a year, i don't know now). Renal. Kidney-Lungs-brain: that's the progression. Her kidney had a softball on it. Lungs were FULL of cancer--doctor wondered how she could even walk around. Three tumors on her brain.
So we gathered and prayed, with the oil and the faith, and God took all but four small spots of cancer out of her lungs. The brain we got radiation (didn't like that a bit). and they tried to cut off blood to the kidney one...
2 and a half years later, we were moved into this great mission-house here in Northside together to weather the season of Mom's passing. Dad had regained a lot of strength since his severe illness, but seeing Mom fade as she did took a lot out of him.
Shortly after moving into this house together, Mom passed away in early June. Her Body was laid to rest in Spring Grove Cemetery, just around the corner...
There are many beautiful things and moments in those days of sickness, weakness and death. Not just the things we got out of it, either. In fact I am appreciating what those days got out of me.
Like a strong soap, they've removed from me the expectation of strength and health, prosperity and ease, that I had before... To be true about it, the Scriptures had already scoured my mind of a lot of that. I never found health adn wealth in this world to be the promise of Scripture, although I enjoy and abundance of both. But going through what we went through in those days exercised my faith in a way that confirmed the reality of my hope in Christ--our hope in Christ...
So why this meditation? I don't know. My uncle got cancer once. He's better now. Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma... I have a cold and coughed all night, like when I had whooping cough (but much less violent).
There's something about infirmity in the body that is really really good for the soul. Saint Peter said it in the Book: "The body that suffers is done with sin." Experience bears that out.
Mom's passing. Wow. It's been like 4 years. that's not a long time. We're basically still IN that experience, to some degree.
Dad came back from six months of living in the Philippines, last week. Miserable with physical ailments typical of that part of the world, now 80 years old, with memory weakening... he's been getting more fragile. And if you've known Johannes Weiss, you know that fragility wasn't in his expectation of life. he was sure that he and Mom would be raptured!
It was amazing to hear his utter disappointment after Mom's passing. Astounding. He had never prepared for any death at all. He was sure they were going to be raptured by Jesus. you know, 1 thess 4? Caught up while still in the body? I'm talking about their expectation that Jesus would return and take them away! He was very very disappointed.
Well, he's not too cool with the arrangement that worked out. If Johan hadn't raised him up,he would have gone and Mom would have followed in a minute. As it is, he's left here to wander around for a little longer.
So when I wake up with a cough, like I did for a month during the winter, and it's spring and the birds are starting to chirp at 4am. I get dressed, make tea, have some hummus and pita, and think out loud with you, friend reader.
thanks for spending this morning with me.
but around the summer of 2001--June--he got a staff infection in Mexico. THAT was sick. Weeks stretched into months and he was a goner. in a rare lucid moment he said he wanted to go. I told him we would take care of Mom and that everything was ok... it was like that, you know.
enter Johan, the eldest son. Comes into that hospital--i mean, Dad's dying here! Tubes, breathing machine. hadn't spoken for months. Missed--totally missed--September 11th. No kidney function. Dialysis... Doctors were going to cheese-knife his kidneys to see if anything was left! and in comes Johan, prays HARD, out loud, anoints with oil... and from that day Dad had an inexplicable turnaround...
i remain the dutiful son in law, who says, "it's okay. you go ahead and die." to his father in law. what a parable... in this one, i look real bad... (i'm way worse than that, so i don't mind playing that part.)
anyway, when dad got out of the hospital, he was broken. 86 pounds lighter, with this look of fear in his eyes, like a child, or a wild bird with a broken wing.
One fall would have killed him. no kidding. And the fear of going back to those tubes and machines and cold steel and cold hands and needles and all that was nipping at, no--it was like a horrible satan-dog from hell just snapping and baying at him like on "I Am Legend" in that one scene... you know?
That was in the early 2000's. Judy was pregnant with Seth. She traveled back and forth every week, sometimes twice a week--routinely twice a week--to Wilmore from here. I was at a UMC (methodist joint) getting my liver served up to me for making the wrong kind of disciples. Mom was... Mom.
Mom Weiss always cooked for us. Stuff from the Old Country, like potatoes with Kale mixed through, or soups with lots of sausage in them... She always pushed me to eat. Heck, in the first 3 months of marriage, I gained 20 pounds! That was mostly muscle, back then, because I was very very skinny when I married Judy, but Mom's cooking made me healthy. (i just ate taco bell before that--for like a year)
Mom Weiss always cleaned up after us. The whole family. She was so servant-minded. I think she knew her reward awaited her on the other side. She was often burdened, but served with grace. Always.
Mom embodied sainthood. And Mom loved Jesus. That's what she knew--Jesus. Her education in school ended around the sixth grade, but she loved Jesus and she knew the Word and she was wise. And she served...
And shortly after Dad's release she was diagnosed with terminal cancer, and 3 to six months to live (maybe a year, i don't know now). Renal. Kidney-Lungs-brain: that's the progression. Her kidney had a softball on it. Lungs were FULL of cancer--doctor wondered how she could even walk around. Three tumors on her brain.
So we gathered and prayed, with the oil and the faith, and God took all but four small spots of cancer out of her lungs. The brain we got radiation (didn't like that a bit). and they tried to cut off blood to the kidney one...
2 and a half years later, we were moved into this great mission-house here in Northside together to weather the season of Mom's passing. Dad had regained a lot of strength since his severe illness, but seeing Mom fade as she did took a lot out of him.
Shortly after moving into this house together, Mom passed away in early June. Her Body was laid to rest in Spring Grove Cemetery, just around the corner...
There are many beautiful things and moments in those days of sickness, weakness and death. Not just the things we got out of it, either. In fact I am appreciating what those days got out of me.
Like a strong soap, they've removed from me the expectation of strength and health, prosperity and ease, that I had before... To be true about it, the Scriptures had already scoured my mind of a lot of that. I never found health adn wealth in this world to be the promise of Scripture, although I enjoy and abundance of both. But going through what we went through in those days exercised my faith in a way that confirmed the reality of my hope in Christ--our hope in Christ...
So why this meditation? I don't know. My uncle got cancer once. He's better now. Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma... I have a cold and coughed all night, like when I had whooping cough (but much less violent).
There's something about infirmity in the body that is really really good for the soul. Saint Peter said it in the Book: "The body that suffers is done with sin." Experience bears that out.
Mom's passing. Wow. It's been like 4 years. that's not a long time. We're basically still IN that experience, to some degree.
Dad came back from six months of living in the Philippines, last week. Miserable with physical ailments typical of that part of the world, now 80 years old, with memory weakening... he's been getting more fragile. And if you've known Johannes Weiss, you know that fragility wasn't in his expectation of life. he was sure that he and Mom would be raptured!
It was amazing to hear his utter disappointment after Mom's passing. Astounding. He had never prepared for any death at all. He was sure they were going to be raptured by Jesus. you know, 1 thess 4? Caught up while still in the body? I'm talking about their expectation that Jesus would return and take them away! He was very very disappointed.
Well, he's not too cool with the arrangement that worked out. If Johan hadn't raised him up,he would have gone and Mom would have followed in a minute. As it is, he's left here to wander around for a little longer.
So when I wake up with a cough, like I did for a month during the winter, and it's spring and the birds are starting to chirp at 4am. I get dressed, make tea, have some hummus and pita, and think out loud with you, friend reader.
thanks for spending this morning with me.
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
web developments
well, now you can find lew at www.lewminator.com, instead of all the .blogspot stuff.
and you can find a budding website at www.grubbykupp.com
it's just the mock-up, but we'll be making that a hub for our community's web-presence.
thanks to Sam Weber for his multi-talented servanthood in that stuff...
Lew
and you can find a budding website at www.grubbykupp.com
it's just the mock-up, but we'll be making that a hub for our community's web-presence.
thanks to Sam Weber for his multi-talented servanthood in that stuff...
Lew
35
well, now i'm finally 35... I've called myself 35 for a long time--i think since i was about 32.
that's a behavior born of scrounging for legitimacy. you see, when you look like this:
and you roll with church folks, sometimes the only hope you have for a shred of legitimacy in their eyes is to be...older. they might say, "well, he's lived this long, so he can't be as stupid as he looks..."
35 is the age I set for myself in my twenties for the commencement of my tattooing. I figured that by that age, I'd have some sense of what i did and didn't want to have indelibly sagging with my body's slough into old age... by 35 you know what direction things are headed...
at this point, i have no inclination at all toward any tattoos. none. sure, i think about it from time to time, but there's just nothing in me that compels me beyond the ridiculous price of skin art... i'd rather buy real art. i mean art that hangs on walls, not that skin art is not "real".
there are a couple of dudes in my church with good tattoos. i like JP's man in the fire. I like Danielmatt's hebrew in a circle around a dove...
...so tatts aren't really on for now...
and legitimacy? Well, I gave up on that years back. Searching for legitimacy in the eyes of other people dishonors the great love with which God has loved me in Christ, just as I am. Trying to become something else is a departure from the truth. I am NOT a professional religious, nor am I any other thing that people might hope to pen me in with. I belong to Jesus...
this is my deepest identity: I belong to Jesus. I am the Lew whom Jesus is loving, today. This is my tower of strength. This is my foundation. Jesus, Himself is loving me. This is me at 35.
My greatest discipline is to live in that reality more deeply. I've gone ahead and left self-improvement and wealth-chasing and stuff like that on the side of the road. I'm being chased by Jesus. I'm letting Him catch me. That's my daily discipline... if you can label that as a discipline...
my hope for the rest of my life is that i can give myself more and more deeply into being caught by Jesus, whether I'm falling or running... eventually, I can see myself seated in His hand, kind of reclining like a child, but I'm old and grey and ready to come home.
we may see that...
that's a behavior born of scrounging for legitimacy. you see, when you look like this:
and you roll with church folks, sometimes the only hope you have for a shred of legitimacy in their eyes is to be...older. they might say, "well, he's lived this long, so he can't be as stupid as he looks..."
35 is the age I set for myself in my twenties for the commencement of my tattooing. I figured that by that age, I'd have some sense of what i did and didn't want to have indelibly sagging with my body's slough into old age... by 35 you know what direction things are headed...
at this point, i have no inclination at all toward any tattoos. none. sure, i think about it from time to time, but there's just nothing in me that compels me beyond the ridiculous price of skin art... i'd rather buy real art. i mean art that hangs on walls, not that skin art is not "real".
there are a couple of dudes in my church with good tattoos. i like JP's man in the fire. I like Danielmatt's hebrew in a circle around a dove...
...so tatts aren't really on for now...
and legitimacy? Well, I gave up on that years back. Searching for legitimacy in the eyes of other people dishonors the great love with which God has loved me in Christ, just as I am. Trying to become something else is a departure from the truth. I am NOT a professional religious, nor am I any other thing that people might hope to pen me in with. I belong to Jesus...
this is my deepest identity: I belong to Jesus. I am the Lew whom Jesus is loving, today. This is my tower of strength. This is my foundation. Jesus, Himself is loving me. This is me at 35.
My greatest discipline is to live in that reality more deeply. I've gone ahead and left self-improvement and wealth-chasing and stuff like that on the side of the road. I'm being chased by Jesus. I'm letting Him catch me. That's my daily discipline... if you can label that as a discipline...
my hope for the rest of my life is that i can give myself more and more deeply into being caught by Jesus, whether I'm falling or running... eventually, I can see myself seated in His hand, kind of reclining like a child, but I'm old and grey and ready to come home.
we may see that...
The Name of the Game
Discernment of Truth from Error and Deception, people.
Nowadays in the church there is a ton of verbal and written material masquerading as the Gospel of Jesus Christ. Entire communities are being built on this stuff and wind up as a masquerade of the Church of Jesus Christ.
I'm talkin counterfeits, folks. Good old Matthew 7, stinky-fruited, counterfeits. Aplenty.
I'm talkin Galatian super-apostles with greed-friendly pseudo-gospels... I'm talking the leaven of the pharisees and the sadduccees. I'm talking the leaven of herod...
these three leavens are important keys:
pharisees: religious zeal worked out in the flesh. Look at Romans 10.
sadduccees: using religion to build a cushion around yourself. milking it for the benefits, while not believing...
Herodians: using religion to build up a political power machine. We all ought to be ashamed for how this has gone unconfronted in the church! Flags next to the cross! for shame.
and herod was a despot! I'll finish this up later...
Nowadays in the church there is a ton of verbal and written material masquerading as the Gospel of Jesus Christ. Entire communities are being built on this stuff and wind up as a masquerade of the Church of Jesus Christ.
I'm talkin counterfeits, folks. Good old Matthew 7, stinky-fruited, counterfeits. Aplenty.
I'm talkin Galatian super-apostles with greed-friendly pseudo-gospels... I'm talking the leaven of the pharisees and the sadduccees. I'm talking the leaven of herod...
these three leavens are important keys:
pharisees: religious zeal worked out in the flesh. Look at Romans 10.
sadduccees: using religion to build a cushion around yourself. milking it for the benefits, while not believing...
Herodians: using religion to build up a political power machine. We all ought to be ashamed for how this has gone unconfronted in the church! Flags next to the cross! for shame.
and herod was a despot! I'll finish this up later...
Monday, May 12, 2008
leveling with you on Hughes Center
I'm gonna level with you about our local Inner city high school, the Hughes Center. We had 2 girls (zara and pia) there from Turkmenistan and Thailand in 2004. They had a wonderful year and really got a great exchange experience. We were proud of all that the urban center had to offer...
now, our exchange son, Marcelo (Brazil) attends... it's not the same as it used to be. I knew it right off the bat as I was pulled aside by 2 of the teachers who have known me since 2004 and told that the district's policies and slavery to testing and national standards have stripped it of educational power... not to mention the overwhelming tide of fatherlessness that has destroyed the ability of the school's faculty to reach the minds and hearts of the kids...
look at this clip from youtube. This is literally what it's like around there, adn in my neighborhood, all the time. Today, the teachers just let the kids go to Arby's or something... most days at least 2 periods are spent in watching movies...
here's that clip
and here's another
now, our exchange son, Marcelo (Brazil) attends... it's not the same as it used to be. I knew it right off the bat as I was pulled aside by 2 of the teachers who have known me since 2004 and told that the district's policies and slavery to testing and national standards have stripped it of educational power... not to mention the overwhelming tide of fatherlessness that has destroyed the ability of the school's faculty to reach the minds and hearts of the kids...
look at this clip from youtube. This is literally what it's like around there, adn in my neighborhood, all the time. Today, the teachers just let the kids go to Arby's or something... most days at least 2 periods are spent in watching movies...
here's that clip
and here's another
Sunday, May 11, 2008
something i noticed about not being exhausted
judy's back. this day was wonderful. the church is making new disciples. people are growing in their faith... our family is solid in life together and in god...
something i noticed this afternoon:
When i'm not exhausted, i do the dishes and clean up after myself... I arrange tools and clean up the yard...
fact: there are a lot of things to do--to many--in this life we have over here... there are simply not enough people to do it all... while judy was away, i let the lawn just grow a foot.
I got the mower running and de-gummed the weedwacker's motor, reviving it from uselessness. I got the starter out of the tercel adn replaced it... but the lawn grew a foot, adn the dishes piled up...
With Sam in the house, things have held together. With Marcelo, Aaron, and Seth all pitching in and helping me "keep it real", we've emerged from this last week with Judy on the road, in good shape, thanks God.
But today I noticed that I'm not emotionally exhausted, and putting the dishes away and packing up the food didn't totally seem like a drag at all...
I am fascinated that a lack of exhaustion can bring such productivity.
You know, I make sure to get rest and exercise. I make sure to meditate on the word and to pray all day and in special times... but sometimes there's a refreshing to me, and I feel really good. thanks, father, for a period of refreshing.
in all the trials and all the chaos of this hostile rock of a planet--through all the heavenly rebellion and the grating disobedience and hostility of our fallen world--Jesus is with us!
I don't aspire to "non-exhaustedness". I will not seek it. I will notice it, however, and I hope that JOY will be more and more my strength...
Lew.
something i noticed this afternoon:
When i'm not exhausted, i do the dishes and clean up after myself... I arrange tools and clean up the yard...
fact: there are a lot of things to do--to many--in this life we have over here... there are simply not enough people to do it all... while judy was away, i let the lawn just grow a foot.
I got the mower running and de-gummed the weedwacker's motor, reviving it from uselessness. I got the starter out of the tercel adn replaced it... but the lawn grew a foot, adn the dishes piled up...
With Sam in the house, things have held together. With Marcelo, Aaron, and Seth all pitching in and helping me "keep it real", we've emerged from this last week with Judy on the road, in good shape, thanks God.
But today I noticed that I'm not emotionally exhausted, and putting the dishes away and packing up the food didn't totally seem like a drag at all...
I am fascinated that a lack of exhaustion can bring such productivity.
You know, I make sure to get rest and exercise. I make sure to meditate on the word and to pray all day and in special times... but sometimes there's a refreshing to me, and I feel really good. thanks, father, for a period of refreshing.
in all the trials and all the chaos of this hostile rock of a planet--through all the heavenly rebellion and the grating disobedience and hostility of our fallen world--Jesus is with us!
I don't aspire to "non-exhaustedness". I will not seek it. I will notice it, however, and I hope that JOY will be more and more my strength...
Lew.
Saturday, May 10, 2008
today was a saturday spent... well spent...
in the morning, I had a meeting with Akylbek, one of my Language and Cultural Orientation Students (I have about 10 per year) who come in the summer for a 2 week seminar before their 10 month high school exchange year.
Akylbek has grown immensely. I am impressed. I am amazed. 20 pounds of muscle, 3 or so inches in height, and a TON of Character. He has braved the cultural barriers between Kyrgyzstan and Here and come the whole way. His word? "Flexibility". He gave me a great interview vid on "Flexibility".
Then I powered off in my wonderful crappy eighteen year old toyota corolla that gets 36 miles per gallon city driving... I hate hypenation, but in case3 you could tell, sorry I didn't hyphenate that....
I powered off for Seth's soccer game.
Did you know that the league won't allow the coaches to tell kids to hang back and play positions? Hilarious. They WANT them to just mob that ball and kick around. Love it. Granted, our World Cup hopes aren't that great, but how great will they ever be with pathetic/pathological coaches and parents pushing kids into sixth grade acl injuries? Look it up. We're a crazy people! Americans... living by appetite.
After soccer, Sam and I cleaned in the backyard and on the side porch. We discussed urban agriculture and composting possibilities. We've settled on "black bag composting" to seed a series of compost pits. We have a bunch of leaves and needles that we black bagged about 6 months ago. It is totally great now, with worms and snails and everythign great living in it. It is ready to be mixed with other stuff. And I'm talking about a lot of very healthy nightcrawlers, here...
after yardwork and agricultural plotting (we're hoping to test our soil and look into some real food crops in the next few years...) I took sam with me to Delhi Township's skatepark.
All I'm saying is that they need drainage over there. It's a great park, but the rains this week have once again rinsed a ton of dusty mud onto the park. dangerous. We left pretty soon after. maybe an hour of skating...
Then back to the house and off with Marcelo and Seth to see "Speed Racer" in Springdale, at 540pm...
The whole time, Aaron is at a skatepark, shredding. He did that all day.
After Speed Racer, we ate Chick Fil A. Seth enjoyed the playpipes over there and we headed to the skatepark in St. Bernard to retrieve Aaron. Skated for about 40 min. there. Seth was lovin it. on a Lance mountain Dough boy board... with gullwing trucks!
Adn then to drop off Caleb, we were held up by a train, right next to a great little spot for wallrides. I just skated for the 20 minutes it took that huge train to pass. We all did, except for Aaron, who was wiped.
Seth is even out there at 10pm, skating while that train passed...
We took Caleb home b/c he was already in trouble. Then back out to Kroger to get M-day gifts for Judy. Tomorrow's M-day.
I love my mom, too. Mom, if you read this, i'm sorry if i come offf like a twerp. I kind of am. not your fault.
And then showers and 11pm beds. done.
in the morning, I had a meeting with Akylbek, one of my Language and Cultural Orientation Students (I have about 10 per year) who come in the summer for a 2 week seminar before their 10 month high school exchange year.
Akylbek has grown immensely. I am impressed. I am amazed. 20 pounds of muscle, 3 or so inches in height, and a TON of Character. He has braved the cultural barriers between Kyrgyzstan and Here and come the whole way. His word? "Flexibility". He gave me a great interview vid on "Flexibility".
Then I powered off in my wonderful crappy eighteen year old toyota corolla that gets 36 miles per gallon city driving... I hate hypenation, but in case3 you could tell, sorry I didn't hyphenate that....
I powered off for Seth's soccer game.
Did you know that the league won't allow the coaches to tell kids to hang back and play positions? Hilarious. They WANT them to just mob that ball and kick around. Love it. Granted, our World Cup hopes aren't that great, but how great will they ever be with pathetic/pathological coaches and parents pushing kids into sixth grade acl injuries? Look it up. We're a crazy people! Americans... living by appetite.
After soccer, Sam and I cleaned in the backyard and on the side porch. We discussed urban agriculture and composting possibilities. We've settled on "black bag composting" to seed a series of compost pits. We have a bunch of leaves and needles that we black bagged about 6 months ago. It is totally great now, with worms and snails and everythign great living in it. It is ready to be mixed with other stuff. And I'm talking about a lot of very healthy nightcrawlers, here...
after yardwork and agricultural plotting (we're hoping to test our soil and look into some real food crops in the next few years...) I took sam with me to Delhi Township's skatepark.
All I'm saying is that they need drainage over there. It's a great park, but the rains this week have once again rinsed a ton of dusty mud onto the park. dangerous. We left pretty soon after. maybe an hour of skating...
Then back to the house and off with Marcelo and Seth to see "Speed Racer" in Springdale, at 540pm...
The whole time, Aaron is at a skatepark, shredding. He did that all day.
After Speed Racer, we ate Chick Fil A. Seth enjoyed the playpipes over there and we headed to the skatepark in St. Bernard to retrieve Aaron. Skated for about 40 min. there. Seth was lovin it. on a Lance mountain Dough boy board... with gullwing trucks!
Adn then to drop off Caleb, we were held up by a train, right next to a great little spot for wallrides. I just skated for the 20 minutes it took that huge train to pass. We all did, except for Aaron, who was wiped.
Seth is even out there at 10pm, skating while that train passed...
We took Caleb home b/c he was already in trouble. Then back out to Kroger to get M-day gifts for Judy. Tomorrow's M-day.
I love my mom, too. Mom, if you read this, i'm sorry if i come offf like a twerp. I kind of am. not your fault.
And then showers and 11pm beds. done.
Friday, May 9, 2008
Thursday Nights
you can read back about thursday nights in our community. about 5 years back, Judy started meeting with Christine and maybe prari, and that morphed into a regular thursday night women's time of study, prayer and sharing...
the men hit the word on thursdays... with ol lew jammin it down their throats. We're going to be posting audio clips that you'll be able to listen to, soon... we have them going back 2 years or so...
and last night the women joined the men, and Lew started a study on Elijah.
hey, it was overwhelming to lew.
my head was spinning. i couldn't believe the hunger for the Word of God in the room. I felt like we needed to seriously commit to studying the history of Israel, starting with 1 Cor. 10, where it tells us why we even have the history of Israel in our bibles.
gogogogogogogo!!!!!
the men hit the word on thursdays... with ol lew jammin it down their throats. We're going to be posting audio clips that you'll be able to listen to, soon... we have them going back 2 years or so...
and last night the women joined the men, and Lew started a study on Elijah.
hey, it was overwhelming to lew.
my head was spinning. i couldn't believe the hunger for the Word of God in the room. I felt like we needed to seriously commit to studying the history of Israel, starting with 1 Cor. 10, where it tells us why we even have the history of Israel in our bibles.
gogogogogogogo!!!!!
Thursday, May 1, 2008
Just another...
just another minute or two with you, my readers, to attempt to press home one idea:
this idea is that JESUS, HIMSELF, is whom we are to please.
right now
right here
today
Jesus is the focus of our thoughts, life, everything...
Jesus is the one we live to please, and this isn't burdensome, in light of the great love with which he has loved us and the great price at which he won us back from sin, ourselves, the claim of the devil, the power of entropy...the suction of this swirling world...
Jesus. All the angels worship Him. ...in whom all the fullness of Deity dwells... whom Thomas calls "My Lord and My God"
Everlasting Father
Mighty God
Wonderful
Counsellor...
Jesus.
Name above all names at which every knee shall bow.
Nothing matters but what He thinks.
How does this shape your worship? How does this shape your outworking of faith? Do you think God put you here to serve your neighbor? your community? Do you think that serving men is what God commissioned you to do? No.
you are commissioned to make disciples for Jesus, preaching the gospel He preached and the Good news that He has come and that He is the One. We are commanded to love each other and to love Him with all we have, and our neighbor as ourself.
We are committed to endure shame with Him, bearing the stigma of the cross in a swirling world...
just another shot to focus us...
there's just nothing better around than Jesus Himself, of whom the Scriptures testify.
this idea is that JESUS, HIMSELF, is whom we are to please.
right now
right here
today
Jesus is the focus of our thoughts, life, everything...
Jesus is the one we live to please, and this isn't burdensome, in light of the great love with which he has loved us and the great price at which he won us back from sin, ourselves, the claim of the devil, the power of entropy...the suction of this swirling world...
Jesus. All the angels worship Him. ...in whom all the fullness of Deity dwells... whom Thomas calls "My Lord and My God"
Everlasting Father
Mighty God
Wonderful
Counsellor...
Jesus.
Name above all names at which every knee shall bow.
Nothing matters but what He thinks.
How does this shape your worship? How does this shape your outworking of faith? Do you think God put you here to serve your neighbor? your community? Do you think that serving men is what God commissioned you to do? No.
you are commissioned to make disciples for Jesus, preaching the gospel He preached and the Good news that He has come and that He is the One. We are commanded to love each other and to love Him with all we have, and our neighbor as ourself.
We are committed to endure shame with Him, bearing the stigma of the cross in a swirling world...
just another shot to focus us...
there's just nothing better around than Jesus Himself, of whom the Scriptures testify.
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